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Monday, November 27, 2006

Is it a monkey or a man?

(click the title to see the original post) Here is what you should do. Take into the elements the structure of the face and the pictures used to answer the question:Is it man or monkey?

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Polar Opposites

Polar opposites don't push away
It's the same on the weekends as the rest of the days
And I know I should go but I'll probably stay
And that's all you can do about some things
I'm trying to drink away the part of the day
That I cannot sleep away
Two one eyed dogs, they're looking at stereos
Hi-fi Gods try so hard to make their cars low to the ground
These vibrations oil its teeth
Primer gray is the color when you're done dying
I'm trying to drink away the part of the day
That I cannot sleep away
---Written by Modest Mouse

Monday, November 13, 2006

Women are like Peanut Butter

I have learned a lesson I thought I should share to all men out there.

Women are like peanut butter. Why?

Some are crunchy, smooth or in between.

Some come in small, medium or large sizes.

Some guys dont like peanut butter.

Some types of peanut butter spread easy, some dont.

Some are only good with toast.

Peanut butter never slides off, but it can make a big mess.

Sometimes it never leaves by sticking to the roof of your mouth.

Peanut butter can loads of enterainment.

One thing that will always be clear, is that peanut butter will always go wellwith Jelly.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Info

You want to know what I think is the most unappreciated job? Makers of Tombstones(not the pizza). No one dares even try to figure out who made them. So in a short search of who they are, here is a link to a website that helps: Fewell Monuments Company I hope you enjoy this.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

The peace in your war

The soldiers come running
The guns are being shot
And the body count is rising
The screams are getting louder
The slayers are getting prouder
For so it may seem there is this war
For which my mind it does bore
There she comes to hold your hand and say hi
She brings peace in a lifetime of war
Save your soul for someone who cares
In a lifetime of war only true love does dare
For the one moment you can lay down the gun
And run to the person who calls you Hun
The places for which bare the dead bodies
Are for a moment covered in dollies
And for that moment of peace you forget the war
You forget the trouble and the hate that your mind held in store
And the composer plays the peaceful score
Hold her hand and walk away
From the mind you have today
In your lifetime of unrealistic warShe was the only one to bring you peace.

Cliff Falling

Falling off the cliff you can realize
Your mind is not in focus
Your senses are out of whack
Mother Father Maybe sister or brother
Your hands are pale
Your lips have gone purple
Each breath is a gasp for air
Life is short but yet feels so long
Your feet fly up
Your legs kick away the pain
Your arms try to grab the air
Dog Cat or maybe non of that
Grace your mind of all the times
Friends have called
Or played the fiddle
Fun is a three letter word always misinterpreted
Your tears evaporate along with all your previous hate
The chill of the air tickles your spine
For now you know it is your time
Come in wrinkly go out the same
Fall off the cliff
And regain your sane.

Friday, October 06, 2006

My heart

Take the heart out
Beat it with a stick
Incase it in a jar
Do with it as you please
Just dont hold it in front of me
Dont allow me to see what it was I once had
I cant watch you as you squeeze out all the blood
Only tears will come
I try to hide the pain
I try to bear the suffering
As have others done before
But the only hatred I can chant
Is the curse that for which you have done to me
Be done to you everyday
I can only lie here on the floor
Asking myself, is this what Jesus felt?
But only I know the truth
Only tears will come.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Mad World

All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
'Cos I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very
Mad World
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
Made to feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
(Song lyrics to "Mad World" by Tears for Fears' as heard on the 1983 album 'The Hurting')

Thursday, September 21, 2006

"Smiling" Act:Two-Bustin' My Balls For Bullshit

I walk towards Scat's vehicle. I open the car and reach for my smokes on top the dash. When things get hairy you never leave a sign that you were there. I light up in the rain. Bloodied Rockstar approaches me from behind. I turn around to see parts of his face still barely bleeding. He looks at me and says "Can I have one?" Without question I toss the pack over to him and say "Sure, you can even have two". He grabs a cig then tosses it back to me. I offer Scat a smoke, this time he accepts. You don't fuck with Obi Scat Cat. No one fucks with Obi Scat Cat and gets away it. Rockstar, looks at us then at the ground "What the hell is next then?". You have to go back to zero. All this time you were led the wrong way, the only thing you can do is go back if you want to make a clear choice. Scat says to us "I am not one to host or post this negativity, but the way it shapes the things around me is something I cannot watch nor will bare for it to happen. " I flick my cig and look at Scat then Rockstar. "We going or are we gonna sit here and get fucking diseases?" says Scat. We got in his car. For some odd reason I knew that even if we gotta go back to zero, that we actually accomplished something. Its news like that that makes me smile.

I said my usual greetings and did my routine to Rosa. We have this mutual understanding. I don't fuck with her, she don't fuck with me. If someone on this block goes and mess's this shit up I go gun ho on their ass. In trade she gives me a few tomatoes or vegetables along with some cash. Protection ain't cheap nor is losing in the county fair to some fucking prick who uses chemicals to enhance their crop. Her 'other crop' is my business. No one fucks this shit up. No one. I watch through the back of my eye as she weeds the plants. I say nothing but I smile a grizzly smile.

The two cats greet me at the door. Chucks there already with a smoke lit. He's sitting next to Scat. "Pull up a chair." Scat says while gesturing with his hand. I grab a chair and sit across from the two. Chuck says "We need to talk" . As soon as I sit down I start moving around in my chair. I couldn't get comfortable nor was it a comfortable situation.Chuck says to me in a sly voice, "Hey man whats goin on?" I respond while lighting up a cig, "As if you hadn't noticed, Rockstar isn't the problem." Chuck tilts back in his chair and Obi Scat Cat hangs his head. "If it ain't him then who is it?" I say. Chuck looks at me and gives me no answer and Scat can only look down. I ash my cig and head towards the door, just then Chuck stops me " Keep an eye out on Rockstar." I respond "I lost my one good eye before and I AIN'T losing my other." I look back at Scat. His look could freeze ice. He knew something wasn't right almost worse than it was before. Chuck looked at me and smiled a devious smile.

We gathered for what we hoped was a good poker meeting. Everyone was there in their usual spot. I look at my cards and I look back over at Scat. Chucks whispering in Scat's ear. Next thing you know I catch a glimpse of Chuck slipping scat some papers. After poker was over everyone started to leave. I was in my usual last place in the line. I lit up a smoke before I could press the door open. "You ain't fucking going nowhere." says Scat. "I ain't? Who the fuck says?" I respond. "Listen, we got ourselves a problem" said Scat. He slid the papers in front of me as I grab a chair on the table. "Some motherfucka named Ned Toys took those fucking pictures". They were pictures of Chuck and Limps makin' babies sorta speak. "Shit like this is gonna hit the press and bring a shame to our boy. This little fuck keeps following our boy just to see if he fucks up. Looks like he got one, but that ain't the point. He seems to be fishing for this shit to make big. We need him gone, and done before this hits the press...Oh and don't forget our little fuck is gonna be at the annual ball. So if you have nothing planned, theres your chance." I looked up at Scat and smiled. Finally I get to be let out again.

The ball. Its the annual get together of local thugs, corrupt and noncorrupt officials and rich bastards. Its one night where we all dress up and pretend to like each other. Everyone will be there. Rockstar has the stage that night.Ned Toys is this smooth as ice young kid who takes pictures of well known faces in bad places. You cant threaten this young punk because hes dumb enough to not buy it. In order to get rid of this problem he has to be rid of altogether. Thats where I come in. In order to make this go as planned, he cant be dead before the ball. I call up my Vids.

"Vids and Harry's Video and Harware Store, how can I help you?"

"Im looking for Vids"

"One moment, please hold as I transfer you over sir."
Vid and Harry's Video and Harware Store is a store owned by Vids. Awhile back before he got it, it was called Harry's Hardware. Vids got the place basically for free. He worked out a deal with Obi Scat Cat, vowing to keep the hardware for Scat's "needs" in exchange for the store. Besides they were buddies long before Scat was Scat.

"Hi this is-"

"Vids I need your help."

"What the fuck do you need?" he responds.

"I need some good hardware for the ball"

"What kind of hardware we looking at?"he says.

"I'll put it this way: Vehicle, man, silence. Ok?"

"Pick it up as soon as you need it will be ready. Just don't forget the fact you gotta bring em back so I can make it look good, you know what I'm saying?" Vids says softly.

"Yeah."

"Good, I'll see ya around."
*Click*

(to be continued)

Monday, September 18, 2006

MY POST, YOUR POST, OUR POST.

(I leave the rest of the post for you to fill in.
The rules are as followed: You are to finish the story. In the comments part, leave your entry and links to your site and other information about you that you want others to see. The vulgarity is limitless so please do what you can.)

She laid there drenched in her own blood. Braile paper was every where, soaked by her blood. The radio was playing "Ear doctor: Sound test 4".....

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Travel like Tyler

Click the title to read a joint theory on time travel.

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Serial Heartbraker

Get your gun girl!
(get your gun)
Load and aim girl!
(get your gun)
Shoot and kill girl!
(get your gun)

Here comes another, girl,
just waiting to meet you.
Here he comes girl
what are you gonna do?
Hes gettin' closer girl
so set down the fear.
He's gettin' near girl
so hold back that tear.

Get your gun girl!
(get your gun)
Load and aim girl!
(get your gun)
Shoot and kill girl!
(get your gun)

Hey you ol girl
have you seen his face?
The one over there girl
without no expression trace.
He's gettin' closer girl
whatcha gotta do?
He's gettin' closer girl
so please remain still!

Get your gun girl!
(get your gun)
Load and aim girl!
(get your gun)
Shoot and kill girl!
(get your gun)

You've been here girl
is that so true?
He made your heart girl
turn from red to dark blue.
He's getting closer girl
to your blind spot
If your not careful girl
he'll melt your heart in his pot

Get your gun girl!
(get your gun)
Load and aim girl!
(get your gun)
Shoot and kill girl!
(get your gun)

Tuesday, August 29, 2006

This

The rules have been broken
the trust has been lost
everyones the victim
all hope has been lost

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Monday, July 24, 2006

When you think the world is yours
You may not notice all the scourns
Your just another ear of sweet corn
Your just another man watching porn

If the apple fell far from the tree
Whats that mean for you and me
If this is all of Gods land
why is it in short demand

Get your gun sally and run from the man
Get your gun sally you are the that man
Aim for the best and shoot your bullet
Aim for the man not wearing a mullet.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Let it burn

While the stars are a shining
While the kids are a hiding
While the fighters are a fighting
While the liars are a lying
LET IT BURN
let it burn
turn to urn
LET IT BURN
Pictures are a falling
And the halls are a calling
Can you save all your money
Does your honey love your money?
LET IT BURN
let it burn
turn to urn
LET IT BURN
Well the poor kids are out playing
And the rich kids are a dating
The daddies have the caddies
And the movies have the cards
LET IT BURN
let it burn
turn to urn
LET IT BURN
Cause the rich are all poor
We all sleep on the floor
So pur the fuel down
And watch it all go down
LET IT BURN!

Sunday, July 16, 2006

I read it

I walked. I walked till my legs felt melted jellow and my sides burned liked they were dipped in Lye. I had no reason. Everyone tells me I should have a reason, a purpose. They tell me "You should look into this.."and "You gotta do that". Bullshit. I dont know why I keep walking. Maybe its the endorphins that are getting me high. Its late. Maybe like 2:30ish in the moning kind of late. The kind that late night mixed with early morning kind of time. I swat my right hand pocket looking for my smokes. I'm out like usual. This whole quitting thing is tough, its even harder to smoke especially when you never had in the first place. You know what? I'am gonna buy a pack of smokes. I need to find a place. There's a super america in sight, I think I'll check it out. I walk up to the clerk and freeze. If I have never bought one before, how do I know whats best? "My friend here will have the Marb Reds, make that two." Fucking cop startles the shit outta of me. All I can squeak out is a thanks. He puts down cash and walks out and grabs a seat on the curb. Hey clerk dude, who's that cop? "Thats sheriff Harris. You from around here?" Yeah bye. What could I say, I was under age. I whip out a smoke and grab seat on the curb next to the Sheriff. "Listen kid, if you wanna thank me dont. You had no clue what you wanted and only real smokers can handle the red". I Inhaled. My exhale was vomit."Welcome to Marb country. Now if you'll escuse me." Some young punk kids came strolling to the station. The cop disappears. The kids walk in to the station and purchase beer. Right outta the store they all crack open a bottle. Mr. Sheriff pulls a SWAT on them and comes from nowhere. He busts em for drinking then he busts the clerk for selling. I get up and run. I hate running.

Friday, June 30, 2006

Who reads this shit?

I've always wondered what kind of people read the shit I write. So, for the Goodnews Gorillas readers, this is for you.
I would like it if you left a comment describing who you are and why you read my blog. That would be greatful.

Tuesday, June 27, 2006

My Gay Fairy Name is Dancing Sunbeams. How Gay.What's" Yours?

Fuck you Scoots

I will die on Tuesday, June 27, 2062 When will you? Calculate Your Death Date